Confronted By Edmonds

Following the piece I posted to my blog yesterday, I've just woken from a dream where Noel Edmonds seems to be at one of my friends' parties and confronts me in the kitchen.

I'm getting something out of the fridge and explaining the post to my friend when Noel passes by and says "Oh yes, what was that about?". I try to explain about Matt Jones and his record, to try to give it less bile, and he just looks at me with a smile on his face, nods, and walks away.

I nearly wee myself in fear.

(Does this mean subconsciously I'm feeling guilty for bringing up Noel's checkered past? Discuss... )

Fragments from last month...

The trouble is...when I have a dream that's worth writing down, if I don't jot it down immediately, it goes. Usually I throw in enough keywords (balloon, sherbert, Fearne Cotton) to trigger the memory.

Last week though I went back through my workbag looking for something and found a sheet of paper with the keyword fragments of the dream. It's so old though, the fragments aren't triggering anything...it must have been pretty good though for me to take the trouble to write stuff at all. Anyway, here's what I wrote...

College reunion...on the way in Jo then Bex...Sarah...I'll be back...have to find my clothes...lost sports gear after squash...lost property: other bloke looking - "that's mine...and that!"...blue jacket in school...bending Franklin's fingers back...Lawrence (dead) has lost weight...carrying bricks in a wheelbarrow...

OK. I give up. What the bloody hell was all that about?

dreamt i was a writer

and anyone who reads my posts know - it is a far fetched dream.

basically i had read a few pages of the new chris claremont epic x-men story, before deciding i would save it for another time.

cue me dreaming about writing those pages, but differently. but as i was writing panel description and dialogue there i was in the page, in the panel in 4 colour glory.
it was a dream of wish-fulfillment.

and when i finally got to read the comics the next day they were pretty good, but my dream versions better.

fragments

i seem to be dreaming in fragments, or at least only remembering the fragments.
so here are two from over the weekend.

i am in a very orange room. it is a front room. but the walls are all cracked, but they are cracked in an honeycomb style. that is all i can remember of it.

the other has a wooden frame of nine squares suspened in the air, and it is swinging backwards and forwards. i can't see what is keeping it aloft, but i can see where the movement is coming from. it is coming from the nuns who are gripping the frame with their hands and are swinging backwards and forards. there are 3 nuns in each sqare so there are 9 in a line and 3 lines of 9. there is one nun in a red and black get out who is swinging more than the others, she looks like she is getting ready to do some sort of nadia type dismount.
shaolin nuns?

and nuns are popping up a bit for me. must be the guilty catholic conscience at work.

what on earth was i thinking

still weak from man-flu i sat down to watch ring 2 (american version) ended up nodding off and waking up through it all. decided enough was enough sleep called and pat answered.

i woke up at 4am after a dream of such stunning boredom i shocked myself awake.
i was dreaming i was booking a table at a resturant. so it consisted of me on the phone to a waiter going on about the time and number of people.
what was worse when i woke up my first thought was i had forgotten to sort out one of the people.

welcome to my dream life.

Che-Jay Dreams ~ 5

For some reason my last 4 or 5 dreams have had me in countries abroad. A tour guide in Thailand (hehehe). A traveller in Russia and a suspected terrorist in Ireland (I was proved innocent in the dream!). There's also of course been loads of London dreams, I'm sure that is Pat's doing, his constant gushing and memoirs are getting to me!

man flu

red bull give you wings. man-flu gives you dreams.
after several weeks of not really dreaming. i have two in two nights.
the first involved nuns in rubber (if only such existed then i think i would have gone into the priesthood), dominant landladys and chocolate. i will spare you the murky details.

last nights dream was a different kettle of fish. instead of being in my s&m dvd collection i was in my japanese horror film. i am in a house, it is mine (although i have not lived in a house for 10 years or so)it seems to be nicely decorated and furnished, big carpets. there are several floors to the place. i am walking around. i am spooked. something has scared me. something has put me on edge. i am looking for that something. there is a chill in the air, moisture. cold. wet. the walls are damp. i am sweating. water running down some walls. stains on ceilings, bulges in the cellings. dark. clammy. odd sounds.
i just wander around the house, i am looking for something. not sure what.

it was almost a nightmare.

Che-Jay Dreams ~ 4

I had this dream yesterday that my workmate came into work with his girlfriend and was generally showing off in front of her, so I upped and left. Stepping out from the office I found myself in central London and seemingly knowing where I wanted to go but getting lost. A dog chased me up an alleyway but suddenly a woman appeared and chained the snarling mutt up. As I nervously edged by the dog I arrived back on the streets that seemed very quiet and eerie, just the odd car passing me, the dream fades and ends.

not so much a wha! but more of a wha! not dream

i have a tendancy to fall asleep on the floor (currently i have no choice as my bedroom is a store room, which i need to clear out and tidy), last night instead of bedding down as normal i just curled up in a heap.
i did it during episodes 11 and 12 or lost. the dvd kept playing and then got to the point where it went back to the menu. thre it kept playing the catchy but short menu music piece. i am guessing after 3 hours of this being played my subconscious noted this and then i had a dream based on me being lost on the lost island.
can't remember anything that happened, i don't think much did - sort of like the show.
but i do remember that in that twilight between full sleep and being awake i mulled it over, played out some ideas and discussed the dream with myself. hoping against all hope i could get back into the dream again and enjoy it, and further more actually remember what it was i was dreaming about.

mmmm pointless story really.
i have been affected by lost.

Strangest Dream to date

I’m sat in the passenger seat of an old 1930’s type convertible, the sun is shining and the top is down. My partner is driving us along a dusty road, through streets, villages and beautiful countryside, it feels like France or Italy, but could just as easily be England.
I am happy, truly happy and contented in my soul. And deeply in love. My Partner being the main reason for my happiness. We pass some old school friends of mine, stop and stop for a chat. Later we go to a café and enjoy food and drinks with some friends.
Not too strange…
The strange part was my partner…it was Stephen Fry. Now I have never thought of him in a sexual way or in any way particularly strongly. I think he is a very funny and talented man, I’ve enjoyed all his work and am very glad he is back on TV with his excellent programme QI, but to have him as my partner..? I don’t get it. Plus the fact that he prefers men and he is a lot older than me. In the dream however it made perfect sense and it was wonderful.
For a while after this dream every time I saw him or even heard his voice, this wonderful contented, safe, happy feeling would wash over me, it was lovely. Unfortunately over time this feeling has slipped away, but I still enjoy a good laugh watching the show.
It made me think a lot about attraction and the “perfect partner”.

(I was going to post this the other day but ran out of time, and then I sit down last night to find that QI has just started a new season. Synchronicity at work perhaps?)

Che-Jay Dreams ~ 3

I dreamt I was in some sports hall in Camden with Pat and someone I used to work with. I was selling second hand computer games and next to me Pat had a stall selling cakes, we didn't get much business but we sat there in outrageous clothing. I Wasn't very attentive to my stall and only sold one game, I kept wandering off around Camden letting Pat mind my stall, no wonder i never sold much, but in the dream he never said much, just stared fixedly ahead. Odd as Pat is never quiet!

Dream or Reality?

When I dream it is not a dream but real life, at least that’s what my brain thinks. Sometimes this feeling is very strong and so can be very disturbing, or just freaky. The problem mainly comes upon waking. As I move from dream to reality I can get very confused as to what reality really is, as far as I’m concerned what I have just been experiencing is real life, no matter how odd or scary it was, so “where am I know and what’s going on?” It takes a few minutes to realise that my waking world is the real world, and it can be very unsettling. It can also be quite a relief to find that the dream was just that… a dream. My life is strange enough already.

So if you read my dream blog remember that at the time that was reality for me, I believed it wholeheartedly.

Trick Myself To Sleep

A trick I often do to get myself to sleep when I'm wide awake is to have a scenario in mind that I think through, like a film if you like, and this works every time. The scenario changed over the years, but it's an unfailing trick I use to drop off to sleep. Not a dream really, but kindof related.

Earliest Scenario
This was a cross between Aliens and Terminator. I was a freedom fighter against Aliens/Robots that have taken over the world. The landscape has been bombed and derelicted (sp?) and I lead a team of friends (all recognisable people from my life) who've had to take up arms and become soldiers to fight off these baddies. I am not the top leader but one of the important general types. We have to go into places (my old school, shopping centre, etc) and blast away at anything hostile, and pick up survivors (who will also be people I know). I inevitably rescue the girl I used to fancy at school, and she falls in love with me. We fight side by side, although she always has a tendency to get injured. We have to explore disused Alien/Robot bases, and get to pick up lots of cool gadgets ands weapons.

Middle Scenario
I am living a live action version of the old BBC Micro game Elite. I am not the pilot of a Cobra MkIII but the weapons and technical guy. I patch up the ship, and do all the computer stuff. My collegue (someone I know) is a gung ho pilot but I am the dependable one. There's a pretty girl in admin on one of the space stations that fancies me.

Current Scenario
I have a boat tethered in the harbour, a big sailboat that you can live on. My youngest son and I take a dinghy out to it in terrible weather, almost capsizing, before making it onto the deck. We struggle into the body of the boat and shut the door. Inside it's warm and comfortable, and though we can hear the storm rage and feel the pitch of the boat, we're safe and secure and I can make us dinner in this cosy little place, before settling down to watch TV/read/sleep.

This latest scenario usually has me asleep before I've even got onto the deck.

Che-Jay Dreams ~ 2

I've not really dreamt alot recently, since my mum passed on really, odd as I was expecting to dream about her quite alot. There have been a few snippets of her in dreams but nothing worth blogging about. The most recent dream I can remember is working in a shanty town as a stooge of some sort for the actor Ray Liotta, bizarre indeed.

I'm hoping things will pick up on the dream front soon.

madness of king george

last night i dreamt i was looking at a newspaper that had a celebrity spread of king george. it had him in various guises as he attended various parties around town. oh there he is as humphrey bogart, there he is being dapper, being casual, close up on his face, in the distance the usual tabloid spread. all in black and white.
all i could think as i read this in the dream was mmm i know that bloke. the rest of the dream was spent me trying to work out who it was it.
(it looked remarkably like the sister of my ex......)

11/9/05 Dream

Woke this morning with only a vague recollection of the dream I had just had.

It involved Peter Kay singing Is This The Way To Amarillo?

What the fuck...is going on in my head?

martians or somthing like that

last night i dreamt of alien invasions (again).
for some odd reason the only part i can remember is being out on a bright green field, under a lovely blue sky. the two characters (heroes if you will) are dressed like they are the royal family from a pack of cards (shades of alice in wonderland!). they are wielding a long white pole; it could be a jousting lance, except that it crackles with energy. they are facing the oncoming rush of aliens, as far as i can you never really see the aliens, the view of the dream is always between the tip of the lance and the characters, as they battle away at stopping the on rushing aliens.
you can hear and see the crackle of energy as they do the job.
at some point rather than be captured they knock themselves out.....

i can remember at some point a large round object making an appearance, it is gunmetal grey, weathered and beaten, and it spins and spins. and things rally to it.

like buses

none for along time and then they turn up.

it seems i either dream in fragments or like trailers for movies i only remember the best bits (though in my case best is a relative term).
so there are two fragments from dreams i had last night.

one just involved me and someone else (no idea who, no idea of sex or anything) just putting hands in the other's face and saying such pithy things as "whatever" "talk to the hand..."
as you can see that one was a barrel of inciteful moments...

the second on all i can remember is exiting a building to talk to a maid (dressed in tradition french maid uniform) about something only she was a cartoon character. i do remember that the other parts of the dream were in different visual styles. just no idea what.

and to add some more a colleague at work told me of his dream the other day. he was pottling into work on his scooter, in a tunnel there is a traffic jam, the lights change, some cars go forward. one stays still, not noticing the changed lights. bibbing and horn hooting takes place. man gets out his car, everyone else get out of theres. a benny hill/ carry on camp chase takes place - lots of high knees and flappy arms, they run left then they run right, back and forth....
my mate leaves the tunnel to a wreck city, only to think he should go back for the scooter.

his dreams are more interesting than mine.
story of my life really.

it was a night for dreams

i was very tired.
i had been at work for far too long.
i got to see some odd people in my all night budgens (a shirtles bloke - this was 2am on a sunday, and no he didn't look like he was back from a rave, more he was lost....) then there was the stocky crumbesque lady of the night who had been dropped off by the police - she was doing a jig that was a mix of "erotic" and angry - she couldn't make her mind up. (and to be honest in different circumstances i would have been in love with her - solid sexy build, with boots on and mad, not much more i can ask for it).
i was eating late (cheese and potato slice - for those that care).
it was pissing down and i was soaked.
when i finally decided to sleep there was a lightening storm.
it all pointed to a dream and half.
was there a dream - hell no.

alien attack

as if by magic: i had a dream.

well all i can really remember is a fragment of the dream, i think it is towards the end of it, but i could be sadly mistaken.

i am in a shopping mall, for some reason i think it is underground. there is an air of panic about the place. we are under attack by aliens.
they are there, and people are dying, i am weaving and bobbing (call me tom cruise - see the opening action sequence of war of the worlds....). people are being killed all around me. a woman wearing a demin skirt has just been tagged by an alien weapon (it is a ball that is phosphorus bright a mixture of yellow, reddy orange and black bits) it drops down the back of her skirt, a scream and she explodes into a bright yellow and black x-ray version of herself before disintegrating (sort of like tim burton's mars attacks).
i am not sure i have yet reached a total state of panic.
i do know the thought that is echoing through my head is a simple one: "oh please let me have sex before i die".

even in my dreams i am shallow.

it had to happen

i have dreamt in colour. i have dreamt in black and white. i have had silent dreams. i have dreams with surroundsound. i have dreamt epics and i have dreamt crushing boredom.
i think i have had only 1 nightmare since i was a child, i have never had a wet dream and very few erotic dreams.
with all of that said the moment someone says "hey lets record our dreams" i stop dreaming (or at least realising that i am dreaming...) so i have no new dreams to add to this. (another reason might be that because i am currently sleeping on the floor in my front room it might not be the best way to have dreams...)
as i say i have had many dull dreams - so much so that i have woken up from them thinking that was boring.

but why oh why am i writing this here right now?
well i thought i would mention my recurring dream. well the dream is not recurring in the sense that it is the same every time, but the central aspect of the dream is the same all the time.
in the dream i am jumping, in the dream i am like mike and i have amazing hang time, in the dream i would have won the slam dunk competition at each all star game ever.
what i do is almost like flying but not quite, it is like i have done a long jump but rather than landing i just keep going on and on. every now and then it feels like i am going to land, but with a wiggle of this and a waggle of that i keep going.
i am not sure if i remember taking off, i am not sure i remember landing in any of the dreams but i do remember the sense of being in motion and of being in the air. there are times when i am doing it for fun, there are times when it appears that i am being chased.
it is a dream that i enjoy.

2/9/05 Dream

I often dream about college, or being back at college. The accomodation and admin blocks were all hideous concrete monstrosities (as Prince Charles might say) and form the focus for many dreams.

In this particular dream, I've gone back to college but have somehow found myself sitting on a table. In the middle of the open sea. With G. Oh and next to us is a talking cat.

The tide seems to be going higher and higher and the sky increasingly grey. G says she's going back to college, and I agree and we climb down from the table. The water is only thigh-high and as we wade off in the direction of college the cat whines that we've left it behind, so I have to turn back and scoop it into a sleeping bag, so I carry it higher than the water.

And then I wake up.

1/9/05 Dream

I'm living in a big victorian house with E, C, and others. But it seems to be haunted - things move, the power keeps going off of it's own accord, that kind of thing. None of us seem that bothered by it though, and I wonder whether it's the spirit of F (despite him not being dead) or a real ghost.

I go outside and J is next door, talking to me through the fence (not unlike the neighbour used to in the TV show Home Improvement). He tells me he's going to go and play squash.

Meanwhile a TV on somewhere inside is reporting a huge flood somewhere in England. On-screen are some rescued people in a boat, one of which is Rochelle from the CBBC programme Smile. For some reason though they say she was a contestant in Big Brother (in my dream am I mixing her up with visa-dodging pool-shagging attention-seeker Makosi?). She appears on the news report wearing a life-jacket and looking grateful to be alive.

And then I wake up.

31/8/05 Dream

I'm in a clean, warehouse-y room that I know is in the back of a shop. It may be in Kingsbridge even. And there's a huge black cat on my back.

It's clinging on by it's claws, digging them into my jumper, which fortunately means only the tips of the talons are pricking my back. It still hurts but I'm a little drunk so I don't feel the pain like I know I should be.

I'm trying everything to get it off - reaching behind me and pulling, trying to knock it off against a wall, attempting to hit it with something, but it's stuck fast. Then, during one attempt to reach behind and pull it away from my back, I manage to remove its arms and legs....

But it clings onto the back of my neck by it's teeth, sinking into my flesh.

And then I wake up.

Che-Jay dreams ~ 1

Here are my two most recent dreams, the most recent first.

I wake in my bed, and there’s and reach for the lights, they don’t come on, I fumble around my flat and try other lights with no success. I blindly reach for the cupboard where the trip switch is and flick it, some lights come back on before gently fading again, I head back to bed in resignation. I come too and its sunny outside, as I rouse slowly I hear noises and go to my doorstep to investigate, I notice a very shabbily dressed women begging for clothes next door, I turn and realise I have some bags in the hall with old clothes. She then appears before me at the door step, she looks very dirty yet attractive underneath the grime, as I hand her the clothing she says ‘thank you, you're part of the family now’

The second dream

In this second dream I’m a colonial marine from the movie Aliens 2. My squad is progressing down a dark sinister corridor from the film when the radars on our pulse rifles light up. With trepidation we advance, the radar blips causing a patina of sweat to caress our brow. As we move into a slightly more open area illuminated in a sublime green we notice alien eggs. Suddenly the eggs burst open but instead of aliens issuing forth its very young children holding their hands out as if in supplication to us, then alien tongues spring forth tasting the damp air. My heart pounds, I wake up sweating, startled.

Great idea

Great idea for a blog !!!

Looking forward to contributing ! Thanks for asking me, I feel kinda honoured.

One thing I’d like to pass on to people contributing is a tip that my diploma psychotherapist tutor told me about dreams. She said when you get in bed and are about to drift off into sleep, say to yourself ‘I want to remember my dreams’ several times over in your head. I’ve been doing this a while and it seems to be working. I’ve also got several books on dreams and studied them on my diploma – hey you can stop yawning right now!

Dream from 30/8/05

I'm supposed to be meeting R for drinking night at the local pub, but as I'm putting F to bed in the bottom bunk I grow sleepy and fall asleep snuggled up to him.

When I wake up (still in the dream!) it's very late and I think R must be furious so I hot-foot it downstairs and out of the back door, where I'm faced with lots of wood that's been chopped but needs putting away neatly on the woodpile. So I start sorting all that out, and R arrives at the back saying "Where the bloody hell have you been?" and I look at my watch and it's 1.20am, but still light outside.

Despite it being so late we go to the local pub (which, bizarrely, is still open) and R tells me that he's successfully chatted up the borderline plain barmaid that we usually ogle over. I look over and she smiles at me.

After the pub for some reason I'm supposed to be going to A's house to stay. She lets me in and shows me round her new flat, and we go upstairs to her room to sleep in her bed. When we enter I can clearly see someone sleeping on the floor of her room, in a sleeping bag, although it's too dark to see clearly. "Who's that sleeping on the floor?" I say. "Oh, that's Lisa." she says. I don't know who Lisa is.

We go to get into bed and I say "Hang on, aren't you supposed to be babysitting?". A looks at me puzzled. I say "God, if you're not babysitting I better go home and look after the children, or I'll get into trouble!" "Oh yeah!" says A.

We get up and she shows me downstairs, leading the way. She goes down the stairway first and looking down I can see she's topless (which I didn't notice before). She looks up at me staring at her boobs and does a kind of 'reveal' as if to say "There you are - happy now?".

As I join her at the foot of the stairwell I notice she's actually not topless at all, but wearing some kind of intricate underwear basque-y thing which appears to be modelled on Robin's costume from Batman & Robin.

And then I wake up.

From The Diaries (1994)

"I awoke suddenly, dazed and drunk from a dream where I had initially been making love to a beautiful black girl and later on, being sad with B (my hands and face mussing over her dewberry drenched red hair) lapsing into security. To The End comes on the radio again, and I wonder if it's all one big conspiracy."

hair

i have long hair.

i once dreamed that i was in the toilets at work standing by the sink looking into the mirror and brushing my hair.

that was it. the dream in all it's glory was me brushing my hair.
even as i dreamt i could not help but think how dull is this......

M

a whole chunk of my dreams revolve around work.
sad i know - but what can you do.

we used to have a slim sexy (and some would say sassy) lass working for us called m. to be honest she was always a tad to skinny for me, but most of the other blokes at work had the hots for her. she had a halle berry vibe about her.

anyway my dream involved her. fruity you might say, alas not.

we were alone, in a darkened room, a hushed and reverent silence all around us. atmospheric lights. but no hanky panky was to be involved.
yes me and michelle were in a library and we were studying......
that was it.
the dream consisted of me and m in a library. there was the banter that students have, but in my dream i studied.....

From The Diaries (1996)

"I'm having dreams again. Or maybe it's just that I'm remembering them. In the first, it's the opening night of a play, a big one, perhaps Volpone all over again. I haven't learnt the lines, in fact I haven't even looked at the script. I haven't a clue. Everyone is looking towards me minutes before 'curtain up', expecting me to shine. But I don't know the lines, I've left it all too late. Suddenly it's time, it's my cue to go on - and then I wake up.

In the second dream, I'm with A. I can't remember what we're doing and maybe it doesn't matter but it comes to the crucial moment and we kiss, our mouths opening and our tongues searching frenziedly, as if at any moment we will be pulled apart. And as we're kissing, I can feel something else in her mouth. Something besides my tongue - a hard foreign body."

From The Diaries (1997)

"Another red letter day: My first Spice Girls dream. I'm talking to Mel B about something or other, puppies are involved but I'm not sure in what context. Funny, I always thought it would be Geri first...

I dreamt about L the other day, the morning before I am supposed to be meeting S, and I can't remember much but I think it was fairly rude. How's that for ironic?"

Mission Statement

OK so the experiment is to post up dreams. Old dreams, new dreams, anything. And hopefully it can be open to whoever wants to contribute...

Let's have a go at this!